I’m not saying meeting me had anything to do with it, but it might not be coincidence that Ray Donovan is moving production of the show to New York City after I met Liev Schreiber! People do say that meeting me can change lives – but I’m much too modest to take all the credit for this news.
This wasn’t my usual pre-planned time or spot to
stalk celeb watch, but I just looked over and Liev Schreiber got out of his car and walked my way. If you ask my friend Weeva, it was beshert or preordained (you know , like it was meant to be); If you ask my friend Annie-Smack-That-Fannie, it was because I’m a lucky SumBitch; either way, there he was.
Since no one seemed to notice him, I walked over and said I was a big fan and asked if he wouldn’t mind taking a photo with me. He couldn’t have been nicer and he didn’t remind me like Taylor Hicks that I was short. He was extremely nice, snapped a few shots just in case they were blurry and then shook my hand afterwards and walked away.
You know that I’ll take a picture with any celebrity and to be honest, I didn’t know some of the celebrities I’ve met. Lets be real, I don’t believe that anyone really knows any professional Golfers except for Tiger Woods so they shouldn’t count! I might not have known who they were or maybe I just took a picture with them because I’m a stalker and everyone else was taking them, but with Liev Schreiber it was awesome because I’m actually a really big fan! Separate from Ray Donovan, I’ve really liked everything he’s done (well maybe not Sphere which I still feel like he, Dustin Hoffman, & Sharon Stone owe me money back for seeing that trainwreck in a theatre) since his first movie when he was Chris in Mixed Nuts (1994). If you’re not familiar with the film, it’s a comedy about a suicide hotline on Christmas Eve. This movie cracks me up even though it got terrible reviews and did terrible in the theatres. I remember going to see it and just laughing hysterically like an idiot. It’s got one of the best casts assembled with Steve Martin, Madeline Khan, Jon Stewart and Adam Sandler so I don’t need to go any further. If you’re not convinced it’s worth a look – listen to Liev telling Conan about the film, dancing with Steve Martin, and sweat pants erections:
It took everything in me not to ask him to tell Naomi Watts to go and tell Nicole Kidman to Holla back at me since he’s the closest I’ve gotten to someone who knows her since I assaulted Tom Cruise – but I was afraid that if I mentioned it – he’d do this to me:
I’m sure with production in New York City, I’ll see him again and I’ll casually mention it then. At the very least my selfie face seems to be getting better, right? You better Be-Liev it!